The Official Blog of Iain Rob Wright: A to Z of Surviving a Horror Movie - W

Monday, 16 January 2012

A to Z of Surviving a Horror Movie - W

Wild West - As of late, the wild west is a magnet for aliens and the word 'Vs'.  It is also has its share of vampires and demons, but a high number of Injun Shaman keep them in check.

Whisper - In a film you can whisper to your heart's content, only a few feet from the killer, and no one will hear you.  You can plot elabrate plans with your friends, safe in the knowledge that you won't be detected.

Wind - A howling wind on a mist-covered night will attract cliche-demons.  These are the worst kind for they will torture you to death with their unoriginality.

Witches - Ancient witches = evil.  Modern witches = lesbians.  Teenage witches = sexy.

Wanker - If you are an Englishman in a horror film then you are expected to say this at least once.  Bollocks is an acceptable substitute.

Warlock - A male witch.  Unless the warlock is Julian Sands, then there is little need to worry as a male witch is about as dangerous as a male nurse.

Winter -  Winter has 46% more horror movie situations than Summer.  One would advise an extended foreign vacation during the cold months.

Willy - A funny word for a penis.  Ha!

Wrinkles - Wrinkled old ladies will curse you.  Wrinkled old men will give you advice.  Wrinkly babies are cute.

No comments :